Wednesday, August 5, 2015

My Grace is Sufficient

So I've been meaning to write a post about how we got here...
On May 21st, after 6 months of trying, I finally took a positive pregnancy test. 

Back in November, we finally felt ready to start trying. We always knew we wanted one more baby, and we always wanted them about three years apart. It was a big deal since my birth with Chloe was so hard and really I was ready to be pregnant, but being ready to give birth again was a whole other thing. 

I had been training for the Richmond half, and I ended up running a half in Winston 3 weeks later. Needless to say all that running totally through off my cycle. Of course I would speculate each month I got my period, why it didn't work. But it was hard, a lot harder than I thought it would be. 

I'll never look at a pregnancy announcement the same way again. It's such a sweet thing, such a blessing, such a miracle. But it definitely makes me think about those that are aching for that as well. I remember that feeling. Nothing could ever make me love Chloe more, but going through this made me appreciate the timing of her even more. With her we weren't sure if it was the right timing for us to become parents, but God knew it was. 

This time I thought it might take 2 or 3 months tops, but once again God knew the perfect timing. If we had gotten pregnant right away Clarke wouldn't have applied for jobs and we wouldn't be back in Richmond, and we are suppose to be here. God knew. And the thing that makes my heart so full is knowing how much I doubted the last month. I was so sure it was going to be negative again. I had convinced myself something was wrong with my uterus from the trauma of Chloe's birth. I doubted God's timing and perfect plan for our family. This verse comes to mind...

2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, " My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 

 In the mist of my weakness, my doubt and fear, God still blessed us with such a precious gift. His grace really is more than enough for us, more than we deserve. I can't wait to meet this baby, I know he or she is exactly what God wanted for our family.


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